Man Pains. Being A Man’s Man In A Changing World

It happens everyday in varying degrees, from the moment you first interact with other men until you go to bed at night, sometimes, it even persists into your dreamscape. That moment you see another man and quietly think to yourself, “now that’s a man”. The last time it happened to me was two days ago when the Springboks showed up to train at the gym I go to. Mind you, I wasn’t the only guy who got more than a little distracted from their workout. If you say you have never appreciated another man who is better than you in some way, physically, intellectually or economically, you are either in denial or you’re blissfully unaware. The latter is highly unlikely. It’s confession time and today’s topic is man-pains. It’s not quite a man crush nor is it perving because this is not about a particular individual, it is a fleeting appreciation, that glance at the next man that lasts a little longer than it should but ends there. Unlike chest-pains which just hurt like the combined fires of seven hells, man-pains are bittersweet.

As men we are conditioned to not express ourselves in certain ways for fear of being seen as effeminate, physical contact and complimentary language between us are often guarded or tinged with bravado. We constantly maintain that bro space, what goes on in our heads however, is something totally different and only rarely given away. I realised this after spending the better part of this year working out, after an almost eighteen year break. Spend enough time in a gym and you’re going to catch yourself looking appreciatively at the guy with the body you’re working towards and when you do, hoping to high heaven he didn’t notice. The irony is, the men who epitomise our physical fitness goals do this and more on the playing field all the time. we’ve all seen the goal celebrations that involve hugs, kisses and butt-cupping or is that butt-slapping? Whatever, my point is, if we weren’t so guarded around each other it may just do wonders for our self-esteeem, but beyond the occasional all-knowing mutual head nod, we don’t dare cross that line. Why? Because of a questionable sense of masculinity.

That last part requires more qualified minds than my own, that said, I think I’ve lived long enough to be able to throw my two cents in. What could possibly be wrong with being openly appreciative of a guy who is better than you in some way? He might just let you in on his secret and you can be great together, not together, together, but you know what I mean. Sharing is caring so share the love with a well-timed nudge or wink and end a life of self-inflicted man-pains, it’s not like you haven’t been looking already.

6 Replies to “Man Pains. Being A Man’s Man In A Changing World”

  1. I dont go to the gym half as much as I would like because checking out the “competition” brings out the green eyed monster in me especially those guys who by an accident of nature get ripped by simply doing 3 sets of 3 reps and here I am i bench press more than my body weight and it doesn’t really show that…

    But I have to confess I recently complimented a random guy I was taking turns being weight spotting training partners with and he told me his secret. He was stacking his amino acids with some liquid carb. I jokingly said he must be “loaded” (a pun on cash and creatine and amino acids. I laughed only by myself because he was just a Jock all brawn no brains ha! Puns go over his head…I am more brain less brawn well that’s what I tell myself to make myself feel better.) The prices of meal replacement, amino acid supplement and creatine are shockingly expensive, I have checked their prices in local pharmacies. Anyhoo my erm “friend”, then goes to tell me that, hey you know you can get those stress packs for animal feeds from vet shops at insanely cheap prices then just mind the RDA (you can google up serving suggestions you dont want toxicity levels) and then buy instant maheu, mix that stuff up, all in all it sets you back just under 10USD but presto you have your very own stack instead of buying something in the range of 150USD that lasts a week ha! A year of learning hey.

    who knows what other secrets our fellow men have hiding up their sleeves.


    ps if i start clucking like a chicken and my hair becomes strangely feathery then please email this to my attending physician where I will be institutionalised


      1. hahaha oh but I have looked at it from all possible angles, I’ve “researched” it and there is nothing sinister in them at all its simply your basic vitamins, glutamine alanine arginine lycine and all the other basic 21 amino acid all exactly the same…. exactly the same…(I repeat) as you would find in certified body building stacking packs, all your need to do is regulate your serving suggestions per ml which is simple volumetric dilution no advanced chemistry skills involved

        oh and I am afraid I cant take your advice …I am already on day 6 of my 21 day challenge see I am my own space monkey/guinea pig walking around with a tape measure to check progress 🙂
        my heart rate still normal
        blood glucose level normal
        breathing rate lower than normal at rest (Yeah! thats a good thing actually 🙂
        but i do feel an uncontrollable urge to howl at the full moon (confession I had that from before so nothing unusual there)

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Day 66 still alive no more crazier than I started, but yep I am faster, stronger and more defined than I been in awhile…. look at this a sixpack *dranks it*
    What a time to be alive, now all I need is a heatwave pool party to go hang out.
    and oh yeah will be borrowing my comments to this post for an upcoming post.
    If I asking nicely and promise to link to this would you let me use the title Man Pains


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